My faith has undergone a major transformation lately. I’ve “known” Jesus since I was a little girl, and growing up, I usually had all the right things to say. For most of my life, I’ve gone to church and heard church leaders describe and interpret Jesus for me. But that is not how one develops a personal relationship with the Lord. My revelation is that I need to sit down and get to really know Him. Now my prayer every single second is, “God, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Father, and King, I want to know you for myself, not through someone else’s eyes.” I’ve come to realize that I need to know God in a more profound way. Mother Teresa was once asked, “When you pray, what do you say to God?” Her response, “I don’t talk, I simply listen.” The interviewer then asked, “Ah, then what is it that God says to you when you pray?” She said, “He also doesn’t talk. He also simply listens.” This is so simple, yet profound. Listening. When do I just sit down in solitude and listen, and allow His presence to fill the space? The controlling part of me wants to earn God’s grace and love, instead of silently feeling it. For the first time in my life, going to church is not the only priority. I want to know Jesus, like I do my husband. I want to know Jesus’ emotions and how He walked on this earth when He came. I want to try and enjoy His love without thinking I need to do something. Lately, it’s been God and me–in the car–getting to know one another in a real way. Now I feel His grace, and I have deep peace. It’s in this stillness that I see God as my Father. I never knew what a father was like. I had one, but he wasn’t ever available. I see Jesus in my husband, in the way he treats my son. I know that Jesus treats me that way too, because I have experienced it. He takes care of me in ways that surpass my expectations. He hears my silence, and even though at times I struggle to know Him, it’s clear He knows me perfectly.